This is my Popo

This is my Popo (婆婆).

Popo is 96 years old and loves to eat, laugh, and watch Chinese soap operas. She grew up in China and lived in Hong Kong and eventually set roots in San Francisco. A while ago, Popo had a bad fall so my parents thought it would be safer if she moved to Sacramento and lived with them.

People have asked me how I’m doing with all the violence that’s happening towards Asian Americans and Pacific Islanders. In all honesty, it’s hard to set aside time to process it. It’s challenging enough working a full time job while raising two kids in the middle of global pandemic.

But when I do have a moment to reflect, I think about my Popo. I imagine what it would be like if she were still living in San Francisco. Where in the past few months, she could have been punched in the face or shoved violently to the ground for no reason other than existing.

And when I think about that, I get both sad and mad. I feel so sad that for the victims that must endure this pain and suffering and get reduced to tears. And I get so mad that someone could be so cruel to prey on someone so vulnerable and unable to defend themselves.

Lately, there are new stories about incidents where bystanders do nothing to intervene. I get upset reading and watching these, but also know that I don’t know why people chose not to help. However, even if you’re afraid for your own safety, there are still things you can do to reduce the trauma the victim experiences.

But most importantly, please remember that if you ever see and elderly Asian person who’s being harassed or assaulted and no one is doing anything, that person could be someone’s parent, grandparent, friend, or neighbor. This is my Popo - my grandma and my children’s great grandma. I’m so glad that she’s safe and taken care of. If she were in trouble, I would help in a heartbeat. But if I weren’t there, would you do it for me?