A Funny Thing About Algorithms

Lately, I’ve been amused by the people who appear in my Facebook friend suggestions. Among the coworkers and people I went to high school with, Facebook has started to recommend celebrities.

“Surely you must know Will Forte, Edwin.” Facebook says. “You have 7 mutual friends.”

I assure you I don’t. But that doesn’t stop Facebook. Every day a new celebrity appears.

Why does Facebook want these friendships to be forged so bad? What’s at stake for you, Zuckerberg?

Some might say that these Facebook accounts aren’t actually profiles. They’ll suggest that these celebrities created these profiles to use as fan pages before Facebook had official Fan Pages and simply accepted any friend request.

But I know the truth: Facebook wants to see which suggestion I finally try to add and then for the next three years, I’ll have nothing but Tim Meadow advertisements on Instagram.

Nice try, Facebook. This is why I use you only for marketplace.